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Psalm 139

Song begins with a heavy, almost funeral-like tones. That's the way it is. To be reborn from above, we have to die first (see Rom 6:4, Col 2:12) and that is very difficult. Who is "we"? "We" is our beast-like, rebellious nature, which is full of proudness and which wants to live and continue with lying and hurting others. And God is telling us - that is not a way to go... but we don't want to listen to him. We try to run away from Him but that is not possible. Either his word exposes our evil nature or "life" wants to teach us THE lesson and some people turn at that point to the real and true God. And when we come to Him, everything what is evil in us is completely exposed. It was so hard for me... but He had found me even in the great darkness, where I was hiding myself. Our evil nature will be destroyed - we may only choose the way this nature will be destroyed: be it with His Word or with His Sword. Will our evil nature be destroyed without us - or do we love sin so much, that the evil will be destroyed together with us - that is the question. The song could begin with lower piano accords to add to this serious and troublesome "life" everyone lives, when s-he still tries to live and walk on her/his "own" way. But still - there is some lying hope in such people, as it was in me - saying them - everything will be fine and everything is fine - but it is not... That is the reason I have left in the intro some higher piano tones.

And when you realize what you are - then relief comes - then you are born again from above - and then you realize, that God was always with you... Those trumpets I have added to the song represent that. When everything is hopeless and lost - the cavalry comes and you are saved... Calvary... and Jesus Christ, who will come back, riding on a white horse (see Rev 19:11-13) together with his army, cavalry. Beautiful...

And if you don't want the cavalry - then you have made a choice for yourself and you know what will follow - you have chosen to be destroyed by his sword and you will perish. If you don't like the truth, the love, the life - you will not get those things... Why should you? Why should God force you to accept something, what you despise? He will give you, what you want.

I will not go too deep here... but know this: the psalm speaks also about David and about Jesus Christ, especially Jesus Christ. Everything, which is good in the Bible, speaks about Jesus Christ and everything, which is bad - is describing us... When you realize this, you embrace the Gospel of Jesus Christ and that Gospel changes you and is changing you - so you will be able to say at the end of your life (if not before) the words, you cannot say now:
Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:
And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

For now, there are many wicked ways in us - but God through the Gospel of Jesus Christ and His Word and life itself is showing the wicked ways and the right way to us and he is leading us in the way everlasting - if we are His sheep and not cruel, blood thirsty beasts... Jesus Christ is the way :)